When The Time Is Right .... ;-))

Milah came one day and asked my opinion with regards to what she had done. She had become a "middle woman" for match making . I could not help laughing out loud as I thought this was SO an ancient practice. :-))  It seemed that it was quite prevalent in the society here. Our staff was one of this arrangement. Kak Noryah and Salmah decided to match make their children. Kak Noryah's son with Salmah's daughter. The children agreed to the arrangement. Now they are in-laws.....

Back to Milah's predicament .... :-D)).... her ex-baby sitter for her kids came to talk to her about her son. She had a son who was in his early thirties and she was worried as he had no serious relationship. Milah suggested one of her nieces but she had to ask permission from her uncle first. So, after she had called her uncle and he agreed on her suggestion to match-make his eldest daughter with the ex-nanny's son.

Her dilemma? How to get them started before the young man sent a proposal entourage? I was laughing at her as she was so worried. As if she had not enough to worry what with her mother in-law who was hospitalised since last week. She had to stay at the hospital almost every night, learned to inject insulin for her mother in-law, cooked for the family, entertained families who came visiting ..... :-)) .... She was quite upset with me !!!! I apologised if I took her dilemma as trivial and petty.

Thus, I told her my suggestion. There was always the facebook. Let them got to know each other and checked if they could get along. Let them gave their phone numbers. Both were engineers. I was sure they would have something in common to discuss although one was a civil engineer and the other an automotive engineer. Both were in Kedah now. Let them arrange between themselves and let's just wait and see the development. Milah's face lit up and agreed to the suggestion. Hmmm ... at least I made someone happy ... ha..ha..ha...

Well, Zarina, another staff who had a daughter now in Uitm, asked if I would be interested in introducing her daughter to one of my boys. Ha..ha..ha... I could only laugh at her suggestion. I told her I did not get involve in the boys' personal lives. If they wanted to talk to me like Akmal did about their relationships, it was fine with me. The boys said they were not ready yet and not actually looking for a relationship as they were still studying. I told them it was fine with me and their father. They knew they were not pressured and they were fine waiting until the time was right.

This brought back what I wrote in one of my postings about arranged marriages. Fauzi was talking about an arranged marriage for Akmal. My parents were very liberal and unconventional. They never pushed us or pressured us into looking for a life partner. That was why I had a brother and sisters who were still single. They were already in their fifties and sixties. So, as for my boys, it is up to them. I believe when the time comes .... the right person comes along .... everything will fall into place .... insyaAllah.  :-))  Allah has already determined it for them.

An Appeal Of Love To A Child

An appeal of love to a child – son or daughter applies

My dear child, the day you see I'm getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I'm going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don't interrupt to say: "You said the same thing a minute ago"... Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep.

When I don't want to take a bath, don't be mad and don't embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a child?

When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don't look at me that way ... remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair and dealing with life's issues every day... the day you see I'm getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I'm going through.

If I occasionally lose track of what we're talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can't, don't be nervous, impatient or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you.

And when my old, tired legs don't let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. When those days come, don't feel sad... just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I'll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I've always had for you, I just want to say, I love you ... my darling child.

Original text in Spanish and photo by Guillermo Peña.
Translation to English by Sergio Cadena