Di Sini Lahirnya Sebuah Cinta - Merdeka ke 57

It's another Merdeka day today. 57th year to be exact. So, how did you spend yours? Despite the MH17 and MH370 incidents, we still celebrated our National Day albeit in a more sombre mood. Well,  I love being a Malaysian. What I had witnessed today solidified the feeling of solidarity, unity and love for this diversified, multi-cultural, multi-religion and at present, the cracks of segregation of races. So, how did I spend today?

I went to watch the Merdeka parade in town after a lapse of soooo MANY years i.e since the boys left for boarding school. :-D)) I walked through the throngs of crowd of adults, children, teenagers, youths of all races. I walked slowly and just enjoying myself walking alone among them as if I was a tourist in town. I observed the patience of those taking part in the parade (I assumed they must had gathered since 7:00am). What gained my utmost respect was the pride and respect the simple people had for their state and country. You see, the crowd was just sitting along the sidewalks and whatever places available along the royal stage. When the emcee announced the arrival of the Tunku Temenggong of Kedah and the TUDM band started to play the state anthem, some of the people in the crowd started to stand up. To my pride and amazement, ALL the people in the crowd stood up to attention until the band completed playing the "Negara Ku". Then, slowly, they sat down and made themselves comfortable to watch the parade. It gave one a satisfied feeling of pride and belonging.

I took photographs and I especially enjoyed the school bands. The participants in the parade walked out in pride and discipline. I could not take all the photos especially by the KMSC (Kedah Motor Sports Club) which paraded their cars, all types of bikes ... ), the vintage bicycles of even the postmen of yesteryears where the crowd called out "Posto! Posto!" .... ;-D)) due to the glaring sun. It was a scorching hot day after a few days of heavy downpour. I was facing the sun thus, whatever photos I took would be in a shadow.When a man in P. Ramlee's costume cycled down the parade, some of the crowd were singing out one his old songs .... I love the this year's theme - Di sini lahirnya sebuah cinta - part of the lyrics from Sudirman's (my favourite singer) song " Warisan".

It was a fun, enjoyable, exciting and full of pride day. I had not watched and enjoyed a fulfilling Merdeka day for so long. Alhamdulillah ... for a peaceful, calm and lovely country. HAPPY MERDEKA DAY MALAYSIA !!! May all of us, the people of Malaysia, learn to appreciate and love our own country. Learn to preserve its uniqueness and openness to embrace all its people as ONE Malaysian regardless of race, religion, beliefs or faiths.

One of the girls' school bands

Looking resplendent in their attire and putting their best feet forward

Marching with a message - "Save Gaza"

I have always loved the army - so disciplined ....

The TUDM band ..

The Boys' school band

Eid-ul Fitri 1435H / 2014M

This year Aidil Fitri celebration was much blessed. For the first time in so many years, we managed not to celebrate Aidil Fitri along the highway. We managed to arrive at Noor's kampung while people were getting ready for the Raya prayers. So, we stopped by the mosque and joined the others for prayers. I managed to meet most of my in-laws and some of his relatives. After a visit to the cemetery next to the mosque, we went to Batu Berendam to visit my sisters. We stopped by my parents' graves in Peringgit. For the longest time, I sat at their graves thanking and grateful to Allah to let me be here on Aidil Fitri itself. It completed my Raya celebration. Usually I would only be able to visit them the next day or before we left for Alor Setar again.

What was so blessed? This year I managed to celebrate Hari Raya at my sisters' houses. I got to eat ketupat daun with sambal kelapa courtesy of Wah (only Wah could make this dish authentic as Mak used to do it). I went to visit my old neighbourhood and walked down the familiar yet so different background. My sisters, Hamid and I visited our old uztazah, Quran teacher and next door neighbour. It was a great time guessing what our names were. My whole siblings were under their tutelage. We owed them a lot for our religious studies. My boys accompanied me.

This year, for the first time. I cooked for my in-laws. Since Noor did not plan to visit any of his relatives, I volunteered in the kitchen to give time out to my sister in-law to go out visiting and celebrate Hari Raya. I cooked for them lontong and sambal kacang. The next day I cooked for them the requested nyonya curry mee much to the satisfaction and delight of my in-laws and the children. I had never cooked such a large amount before i.e. 3 chickens, 3 packets of yellow noodles, 2 packets of spaghetti for those who did not like noodles and a packet of kue teow for Akmal. Otherwise, I played host and the boys made the drinks and helped to clear out the kitchen. We only left at night for Rina's (my niece in Peringgit) open house.

This year, due to Abang's death, put things in perspective for Noor that he extended his leave to accommodate visiting my side of the family. We went to KL and visited Kak Ita (Abang's wife) and Kak Zizah in Keramat. We went to visit Kak Che Mah at Taman Tun Dr. Ismail and got to meet up with Kak Era and Abang Salim. I managed to meet Suraya, my youngest, reclusive and estranged sister. Somehow, I could get along with everybody and she called me up the stairs to catch up. Finally to Abang Omar's house in Subang for dinner. They had not seen my boys since they were just kids. They were taken aback with the age and size of their nephews!!! I may not get an opportunity like this next year as Hari Raya we are subjected to Noor's side of the family. And most of all, I got to meet up with Mak Besah, Abang Omar's mother in-law aka Kak Dilah's mother. She must be more than 80 years old, petite and almost deaf but she could remember who I was after more than 7 years. Even Noor was impressed that she could recognise him as she had problems with her eyes. I could only recite Alhamdulillah, MasyaAllah and SubhanAllah. Thank you Allah.

"Maka nikmat Allah manakah yang kamu dustakan?" A much blessed Aidil Fitri. Even if there is no next year's visit, I am grateful for this one time as all my boys are here to meet up with their uncles and aunties from my side. Thus I will not have to answer Ikram's question -  "Whose house is this?" .... and they would recognise my sons if they happen to meet each other. InsyaAllah.

Abang in memory .... 2

I visited Abang almost every time I was down in KL. Either using public transport or if Noor was driving...I went to visit him with Noor, my sons or my sisters. During the last visit which I went with Kak Hajar, Ikram and Syafiq, there were signs he was trying to tell us. Even though his speech was still hoarse, when he said these words, it was very clear. He said it as a matter of fact and was looking at me as if I would understand. Surprisingly, I understood him what he meant very well. Kak Hajar was unclear about it until I explained to her what Abang meant. He said "Abang dah 71 tahun tau. Tak lama dah lagi."  I told him I knew. What he meant was Bapak died at the age of 71. Mak died at the age of 71. His mother passed away much younger due to cancer. As usual, we usually just ignored what the sick said and did not pay much attention to it. He was a good man and did his duty as a brother and head of the Aziz family with all their idiosyncracies and temperaments as well as he could.

Allah made everything so smooth for him. He passed away on 17 Ramadhan (19 JULY 2014) or "Nuzul Quran". A special date for the Muslims. I had just completed my 3 days duty as examiner for SPM oral for private candidates at Hotel Seri Malaysia. I reached home about 1:00pm. Rested before I started to prepare something for "iftar" and was having a nap when the phone rang. I had not even unpacked my bag. It was from Kak Hajar. I was quite disoriented being woken up from my nap and the news took some time to sink in. It was almost 4:00pm. The first thing that came into my mind was my oral centre the next day where I was the chief examiner. Going home was not an option. I called Noor and told him I was going home as soon as I could. He said he would try to settle everything and we could leave as soon as possible. I called Fakaruddy (my ULKCP chief) to inform him of my situation and he told me to go home. He would take over my place as chief examiner. It was not easy to get one at an instant so he volunteered. Alhamdulillah for friends. ....

We finally left about 6pm. I drove. I needed to do something to focus so that my mind would not think about the sudden demise. As I was driving, the tears just rolled down that it was blurring my vision. Noor asked if I was okay and I said yes. We arrived at Wah's house about midnight as we made stops for breaking fast and prayers. There was no rush as the funeral was the next morning. Kak Hajar, Abang Zul and Nadia had already arrived from Camerons. Kak Ti and Kak Leha with their families stayed at a hotel near Ampang. We were all so tired. When we woke up for our dawn meal (sahur) we recited the surah Yaasin  for Abang.

By 9am, we convoyed to Abang's house in Keramat and went straight to the mosque nearby. There they held a the usual rites of bacaan surah Yaasin, tahlil, solat jenazah and finally prayers by Uztaz Habib Ali. Abang was one of the founders of Pondok Jenderam near Dengkil, a centre for the studies of Quran and religion. Thus, there were many representatives, friends, families, neighbours and strangers who came. We went to the cemetery (Taman Perkuburan Ampang) right in the heart of Kuala Lumpur. The cemetery was surrounded by high rise buildings of KLCC, hotels, banks and other institutions.

Tanah Perkuburan Ampang, KL - the crowd whom escorted Abang to his grave. Women were not allowed on the graveyard until all the rites had completed. That was Abang's wish. So, we waited until the men had dispersed before we went to his grave to offer our prayers ...

It was a cloudy and gloomy weather but there was no hint of rain. Abang got his wish to be buried next to his mother's grave. Everybody was solemn but there were no tears of acute grieving. Just silent tears rolled down the cheeks when we felt the sadness of the occasion. We let him go, our first sibling, who was 71 years old and who was a pious and religious person with our thoughts, love and prayers. I will always include him in my daily prayers for my parents. Hopefully, make a yearly visit to Kak Ita ... my sister in-law so that she would not feel isolated from the family. May Abang rest in peace .... Al-fatihah for Abang, Bapak and Mak. Aamiiin.

Abang in memory - 1943 - 2014

I have 5 half-siblings and 12 siblings of my own. We share the same father. Our age gap is vast ranging from 10 years to over 20 years. Abang could have been the father figure of my younger siblings. Suraya, the youngest of us all is 42 years old which means that her age difference with Abang is 29 years !!! The age difference between Abang and I was 18 years old. My family is old .... Abang had no children of his own. He had one adopted son whom he adopted when he was already in his fifties. Thus, Ridhwan is only 24 years old - recently graduated and has just started a new job when Abang was admitted. The poor, young man had to grow up fast. Yet, with Abang Omar's guidance ... insyaAllah, he will be able to cope with the loss, his new job and take care of his adopted mother.

Abang was first admitted to Kuala Lumpur hospital last December 2013. Partly the reason why our annual "cuti-cuti cari makan" last year was centred around KL/PJ area. He had shortness of breath and was admitted for observation. We went to see him during Munir's wedding reception after we returned from Sabah for Akmal's convocation. When we went for the first time, he was sleeping so I did not enter the CCU ward to see him. Later, he was sent to Prince Court hospital for diagnosis as HKL took some time about it. Since Abang Omar had a friend there, he was sent there. Abang was as stubborn as Bapak was (I guess it runs in the family .... :-}) but he had no say in the matter anymore. When he was confirmed with blockages of his heart, Abang Omar decided to contact friends with National Heart Institute (IJN). When we visited him before his by-pass, he was still his usual self - soft - spoken, calm and just being "Abang" .... That was the last happy photo we took together when he was smiling and still looked healthy.

Slowly, his health deteriorated. After the by-pass, which was a success, he snatched out the tubes in his throat in his semi-consciousness state causing it to be injured and badly scratched. Thus, he lost his power of speech as he could only talk in a hoarse whisper. We had difficulty in understanding him and he was frustrated when he could not relay his thoughts. His lungs were infected. Since IJN could not handle the lungs, he was then transferred to Gleneagles hospital. There he underwent observation for his lungs. Abang Omar transferred him there for faster treatment. He was in the ICU for almost 2 weeks before he was transferred to the normal ward. Later, when everything was  stabilised, Abang could return home. Abang Omar hired two private nurses to take care of him round the clock as Kak Ita also had her own health issues. When he had problems with his diabetes, he was sent to University Kebangsaan Hospital (HUKM) where he also underwent speech therapy. Thus, during my last visit to him in June 2014, he could speak much clearly and he was audible to us. He returned home for almost a fortnight before shortness of breath caused him to be readmitted. According to Kak Che Mah, they went to visit him in the morning, left him to rest and Zohor prayers as it was Ramadhan, and he was already gone. It was so fast and easy. Kak Che Mah and Abang Omar were dissatisfied and questioned Abang's private nurse but he could only say that it was very fast. The doctors could not do anything much. The nurse called them to inform them about Abang's passing. Abang's final stay in the hospital was only for one night. He passed away with no family except for his private nurse who had been taking care of him for almost 2 months. The 2 young male nurses did 12 hour shifts to monitor and personally gave their best, tender and professional care.

It was worth it .... :-))

This is the final Melaka house painstakingly, lovingly and wholeheartedly made by Zin for Abang. Abang had commissioned to make one for him. Zin had made 2 so far and this was the final one.  While ZIn was modifying and fine-tuning it, he was wondering if he had enough time. Abang was already in and out of hospitals. Zin wanted to make this the best he could for his half-brother. We may not be close but we respect and accept each other. Finally, he managed to send it to Abang when he was back home at Taman Keramat.

When we visited Kak Ita, Abang's wife, during the Raya break, I was impressed with this model house. The roof could be opened to see the layout inside. Zin had also created the stairs leading to the attic. It was a fine and intricate workmanship. The windows and doors could be opened. It was a traditional Melaka house. Kak Ita said Abang spent the last week of his life looking at the house every day. He told Kak Ita about the house, whose rooms were upstairs and down stairs, the attic, the memories he had when he was there. Their wedding and other weddings that were held there. Mak Cik's death. Bapak's death. Kak Ita said Abang spent a lot of time in his wheel chair just playing with the house. Letting his nostalgic memories created a smile on his face. Kak Ita was thankful to Zin for completing the house on time and sent it to Abang before he passed away.

Yes, Zin. It was worth it. The model house made Abang happy and I supposed reminded him of Bapak. He had done his best as a big brother as he knew how. Now, let us pray that he is at peace with himself and with his Creator. Aamiiin.....