When Words Are Not Enough ....

Ever heard of the phrase "voices in your head"? When there is so much to say but you just cannot find the words? You feel that no explanation fits whatever you are feeling or going through? How do you explain the reasons why you feel so right when it is so wrong? Thus, you keep quiet and keep listening to the voices in your head .... or heart ....

"What do you see in me?" "Why me out of all the many girls that you met in your life?" "What is so special about me that you just cannot let me go?"

We  have all gone through the experiences, heartaches, happiness, emotionally scarred, physically painful, spiritually broken, deceits and lies, broken promises, hopes and wishes .... all these have shaped us and changed our perspectives on life, expectations and dreams. Where we were once so naive, so enthusiastic, full of optimism, full of expectations, full of life, vigour and vitality  .... where have all that gone to? We are what we are now. No longer the person we once knew and had known. The years of separation do nothing to separate us yet we are so different now. The simplicity of getting back together, the ease of spending time talking and rehashing the past, the easy comfort of being in each other's company ....  I guess is due to the fact that we have no expectations of each other anymore.

Sometimes when what you are going through feels so overwhelming that in the silence of the night, being alone with your thoughts and Creator .... you ask questions that you have no answers. At the end of the day all you can do is take a deep breath and just do whatever feels the right thing to be done.

Although it takes so long to fall into place and understanding all that you have gone through ... at least you have made peace with yourself and him. Although there are regrets and wishing that if only you can turn back time  .....

Finally, it is how you make the best of the situation. Whoever we are with right now is meant for us and is the best for us as he/she is chosen by Allah for us. Yet, only He knows what and who is in our hearts. "If you cannot have the one you love, love the one you have..."