One Day At A Time ... ;-))

A week has passed by 2016. I had been quite busy since my return to Alor Setar from KJ. After the visit to Kulim with Zin and Syafiq and sending them off the next day, I had to oblige my social engagements. No planning, no prior appointments. Just a call and we met up. Firstly, there was Zeti and her children. Noor's sister in-law. Since we were meeting for hi-tea, she called up another in-law (aka my biras). A gathering of the female biras. She joined us with her children too. Thus I had ten of us at Secret Recipe including me. We had a foodie time with me giving a treat to the children who got their UPSR and PT3 results.

The next few days there was a call from an ex-student who was leaving for Klang for a new job. Thus, we met up for lunch and bonded as teacher-friend. I also managed to catch up with Omayah for hi-tea. There were also wedding invitations to attend. Friends and family who came as it was the school holidays. It was a busy time as a friend, family and hostess. So, I could not really say how does it feel being retired? There was also a charity project with Omayah. We went to this very deep- in village to lend support to her friend who started the free clothes and books project. It was very humbling to see how the poor villagers - mostly rubber tappers and padi farmers - felt honoured and grateful for the used clothes that we collected from friends and neighbours. Alhamdulillah.

I always do things without thinking - impulsive and spontaneous ... Not good if people do not know me ... 

Finally, the school reopened. Officially I am a retired civil servant. Thus, to commemorate this auspicious event of my life, I had lunch with a fellow retiree. We took photos and sent them to our young friends who were sweating it out on the first day of school !!!! Hahahaha ... ;-0)))   There were a few things that I had to settle after I had retired. The union where I was a member. Now the status has changed to associate member or a member for life. My health care insurance which was more expensive now since I was no longer in the collected group. I terminated my membership with the KGMK - a cooperative for Kedah Malay teachers. I completed my claims and filled in the requisite forms. Thus, I can proclaim myself a retiree. As my brother Zin put it - with nothing to do .... well, I agree to some extent in the sense that nothing being pre-planned and formed in the mindset of what to do and accomplish for the day. No agenda. No meetings. No datelines. No appointments. NO STRESS !!!! hahaha .... ;=)))

 F

So, what have I been up to these early days? Well, I have the job of feeding the birds and cats. I go for my morning walk after Subuh prayers which is akin to going to school at that hour. I prepare breakfast for both of us. I can do my extra prayers and recite my Quran at leisure. I prepare dinner since both of us do not take lunch after a heavy, late breakfast. I catch up with my reading. If I am bored, I go out for my evening walk and just walk away whatever is in my mind. Night is dedicated to my Maker. By the time my partner is home and I have served his dinner and catch up with each other's news, it is already midnight. Another day goes by .... I am more relaxed. I do not have to rush and run helter skelter catching up with time. I slow down. I appreciate time and every day given to me. I am content being at home. So, why do some well-meaning people keep asking what am I doing now? They cannot accept that I do nothing. Yet, to me, I am doing everything. I am a very simple person with simple needs to make me happy and content. The plus side is - I am being paid for taking my life leisurely .... hahaha .... :-))

They only come in the morning to be fed ... pigeons, tekukur, merbok and pipit ... 

They are so used to you that they wait in front of the gate waiting for you to feed them ...

Only one turn up today - there are 2 more ... they eat about 4 to 5 times a day .. in fact every time I open the door ...  

 Thus, I take one day at a time ... I love this quote ....

For others who is still trying to accept that I am retired from my professional life ... 

2016 - May It Be A Meaningful, Blessed Year ..

"Do not regret the past. Do not be afraid of the future. As there are always hope, opportunities and endless possibilities for a brand new start."  Translation from the above quote. How true isn't it? What's past is past. What's done cannot be undone. What we can do is learn from it. Do not forget but accept that some things are meant to be. What's meant to be will find its way to be. It is Allah's decree and fate upon us.

2015. A year of trials, upsets, surprises, happiness, sadness, opportunities, wishes being granted and hopes fulfilled. It started with my decision to opt out for early retirement. Going all out for the best results that I could give. Changing tradition by asking for no formal function to say my goodbye. I did all the things that I had not done for years - accompanying students on a school trip, volunteering to conduct a cooking session as a post-PT3 activity. Planned and executed my class farewell party at a KFC outlet. Carried out all my duties in and out of school to my best ability. Made so many new friends. Being offered other teaching positions even before retiring ..... career wise, it was a good year because I knew I was leaving. For good.

Home wise - Alhamdulillah. A few upheavals but managed to be resolved through communication, patience and tolerance. Akmal and his turbulent relationship with the present girlfriend. Syafiq with his internship this coming March. Ikram with his FYP (Final year project) and trying to secure another Dean List's award for this semester. My sisters' annual gallivanting was put on hold due to so many minor hiccups and unexpected matters arising. The cats who seemed to have made our house their home. The birds who seemed to increase in numbers. Besides pigeons, we also had the small pipit, merbuk, tekukur and tiong. 

What a surprise and unexpected inheritance from the grave. Bapak had left a couple plots of land right in the heart of town which none of us knew. The government wanted to reclaim this land for road expansion purposes thus hunted for the owners where one of them was Bapak's name. SubhanAllah. Alhamdulillah. Who would have thought  .... it never crossed our minds. And the beauty of it was the ease with the division and dividing it among the siblings without any hassle or protests. Everything was done with ease and smoothly executed. We even included Baba, our adopted brother as one of the inheritors. That was a grand closure to 2015.

The meeting up with some friends whom I had not met for so many years. The comfortable and smooth meeting with my old friend. Meeting up with my group of examiners and coordinators plus saying goodbye to them with small gifts and of course, cookies. Giving a hug and saying goodbye to each and every one of my staff and colleagues. A good year for relationships and friendships.

2016. What does it has in store for me? I do not know. All I know I have no plans. I take everyday as it comes. I have been busy since my return from KL during the holidays. There was always an
appointment to fulfill from friends and family. I even managed to catch "Star Wars - The Force Awakens" .... there is a visit to a poor home centre tomorrow to send supplies and donations of books and clothes collected. There is a planned lunch appointment on Sunday with another retiree friend to catch up. Another trip to Penang to accompany another friend. In fact, little things have been arranged for me by Allah to busy my days.

I managed to catch up with my reading. I am on the 5th series of "The Clifton Chronicles" by Jeffrey Archer. Reading with such intensity book after book just to keep up with what happened next was so exhausting to the mind and body. It was a thriller of families with greed, hate, revenge, love, murder, politics, ..... that at times I went for my walk twice a day just to get the story out of my head. The problem when I started reading was I just could not stop. Since this was a series of books which spanned a century (100 years), I was totally engrossed and involved in it. I sympathised with my poor partner, Noor ... he could just tolerate and indulge me by leaving me alone with my hobby. At least he knew that I was home most of the time i.e. when I was not out with my friends or involved with something else.

Thus, 2016 ... I embrace you with open arms and mind. Ya Allah, if what You have planned for me is a test, give me the patience and strength to face it. If what You are giving me is a bounty, then give me the grace to be grateful and appreciative. Lighten these hands and heart to share with others. Guide me. Give me friends who will lead me to You. Please make this year a beneficial, prosperous, meaningful and blessed year. Guide me to take care of my health - physical, mental and emotional. Let me also take care of others too so I shall be very grateful and humbled. In shaa Allah (Allah willing). Aamiin.

To all page reviewers .... Have a good year ....

Savour The Moment ...

Three years ago we, the sisters, Kak Haj, Wah and I, made a pact that every December we would try to get together for a food trail or just taking time out from our families and bonded together. I would be the driver as I was the only one who could drive and possess a car. We managed to do this for two consecutive years. The first year, we started from north and trailed through Penang, Perak, Kuala Lumpur and Melaka. We started it as kak Haj was not feeling well and could hardly eat. She was down to only 35kg. Being petite and thin, this made her skinny. She just lost her appetite. She tried to eat as much as she could although she would just vomit everything later. Yet, the mission was accomplished as she managed to eat most of the food.

2013 - we did not venture far although we had planned for the east coast. However, the weather was against us and we were afraid of floods. Besides, Abang was hopitalised. Thus, we decided our "jalan-jalan cari makan" would centre around KL and PJ area. You could read all about it in my former postings. Anyway, being in KL made it possible to visit Abang a few times especially at HKL, IJN and Gleneagles. Abang passed away the next year i.e. 2014.

In 2014, we did not proceed with the annual gallivanting as I had to supervise the shop in lieu of Noor's three months posting to Ivory Coast as a trainer. So, we deferred it to next year.

This year, we did not have our food trail as so many things were against us. I did go back to KL with Kak Haj as planned. However, I was down with food poisoning and ear infection which took up the first week. Wah did not get any leave as her company had just secured a new project which needed to be finalised as kicked-off would be in January next year. Kak Ti and Kak Leha were busy with taking care of their grandchildren. Kak Haj could only make it for a week as she had to return to Camerons to help out with Shaun's community project for his university students. Thus, this year we just spent whatever time we had together. So, we shall wait for next year. In shaa Allah (God willing).

Every day spent with my siblings is a blessing. To be able to meet up and just hang around with them is a bonus. Just us without any brothers in-law. We managed to catch up with Hamid and Baba. Adik spent dinner and supper. Zin managed to join us on one of those nights. I was not feeling well but still managed to join in.

It was a blessing with Allah's grace and will. We were still grateful ad thankful for our gathering. In shaa Allah, next year our food trail will be to the east coast and it need not be in December as I have already retired thus with time in my hands ...

Staying In Touch ....

Quote taken from Soo Ewe Jin's column "Beauty of staying in touch" (Sunday Star, 8 November 2015)

"At the same time, I have learned that in communicating, we must not expect to always get a response.
       I believe that not getting a response does not mean that one's sharing is not appreciated.
      We are just different and express ourselves differently, that's all.
       If what I share in a private note, or even in a public column such as this has the effect of   bringing joy to the person reading it, then that is all that matters."

How apt. I have always enjoyed writing e-mails and sent sms or mms but more often than not, I seldom get immediate response or replies. Noor was commenting why it was that we were the ones who always looked up our friends. I told him that he should not have any expectations. If we were free and it was along our way, why not? More often than not, these friends were always happy to welcome us. We lived far in the north and most times, we travelled south to visit our families. Sometimes, we just took the old route and certain friends would come to mind. Thus, we called up and met up. It made us happy. What more of that person .... besides, most of them hardly leave their comfort zone. Our place was not exactly a chosen holiday destination .....

Yet at times I feel like I am intruding and upsetting the other party already busy lives and I will just keep away for a while. I know that this is how relationships and friendships peter out and slowly but surely we will lose touch. Keeping in touch takes a lot of effort especially when we have so many shared memories together. But, all good things come to an end. We leave the old ones due to hardly any communication and build new ones where the eagerness to keep in touch and share are still new and splendid. It does not mean that we have forgotten about them, but somehow it is just not worth the effort. Yet, they are never out of our mind even though its years later.

That is why we have categories of friends - colleagues, staff, co-workers, acquaintance, associate, just friends, best friends, good friends, old friends ..... soul mates. Nevertheless, I always live up to this expectation of myself - if I can make someone happy just by giving my time through e-mail, sms, mms or a call .... why not? If I make someone happy, I will end up happy too.

Friends are forever ...  it is just the frequency of staying in touch that defines which category of friend a person is ...... friends are our roots to who we were before we are consumed with the struggle with our careers, family and other commitments. They are the pillar which uphold tradition, support, love, encouragement, persistence, tolerance, patience .... and most of all, just being there with us. The symbol of bonding, innocence, faith and believe in oneself. So, what are you all waiting for? Stay in touch with friends who have crossed your mind .... DO NOT PROCRASTINATE !!! Life is too short for regrets . ;-} 

How Far Does A Teacher Influence You ???

"Carpe Diem"

(origin  - Latin : Noun)

Meaning in English  -  Seize the day.

In the movie "Dead Poets Society"  -  one of the students of Mr. John Keating's class found this old copy and asked him what the word meant. One teacher's principle in life affected the impressionable seventeen year old group of teenagers of the very conservative and aristocratic school where following the rule and not questioning authority are the norm.

Dead Poets Society was an unsanctioned society by the same school. It was a way for Keating and his friends to express their love for poetry their own way and life in general. Thus, to this group of students it was a way to challenge authority and an outlet for their love of poetry. Mr. Keating unorthodox ways of teaching in class and out of it left a huge imprint in the minds of these impressionable youths who were already controlled by authoritarian parents and school. 

They got "out of the box" as the term was referred to now. They seized the day and opportunity. They reached out far greater heights and in the process tried to push the boundaries of the rules and regulations. One of them pursued and persevered persistently in going after the girl of his dreams even though he was threatened and beaten up. Another managed to get out of his low self-esteem and low confidence by finally creating poetry off hand and presenting it in his class. Yet another pursued his love for acting. Another created trouble by publishing a letter to the school under the society's name. Even though he was meted out the capital punishment, he refused to reveal the members of the society.

Yet, the question goes - how far does a teacher's influence go? When the young lads realised that they had the potential to go their own way on their own terms, they went a tad too far. One of the young men, Neil, did not tell the truth to his father. After his first show as an actor and although he was great and superb in it, his father took him home and decided to transfer him out of the school. That night out of desperation and a sense of hopelessness as he had no choice but to follow his father's orders, he committed suicide. Neil's father blamed the school. The school had to find a scapegoat. It was in the form of Mr. Keating. Though it was not fair but the students could not go against the norm or the rule. On the day Mr. Keating went to collect his things from the classroom, the Principal was teaching as the replacement teacher. One by one his students stood on their table and gave him a resounding applause while calling "Captain! My Captain!" Mr. Keating thanked them while a fuming mad Principal was trying to control the class ..... how far does a teacher touch a young life?

Thus, in life, should we seize the day i.e. grab the opportunity? Yet, there are always consequences we have to consider. There are rules, terms, obligations and other commitments we have to comply with. There is just so much of the system that we can fight ....  at the end of the day ... the choice is yours - seize it and live with the satisfaction that you have at least tried. Or ...  let it go and live with the "What if ... ???"

A fitting end to my last week in school as a teacher. I watched this movie "Dead Poets Society" ... I hope I have touched and influenced the lives of thousands of my students ..... yes, I would do the same thing and told them to seize the day .... ;-))