Patience, Tolerance....

Today I visited a colleague at the hospital who had her left leg amputated due to diabetes. It was a much refreshing experience compared to the visit that I made last week at the same hospital. Last week I visited my neighbour, a man, in his late 50's, who had his left leg amputated due to diabetes, too. His right hand was so swollen and three of his fingers were already affected by gangrene. It was burnt black and he could hardly feel anything. Even the other leg had 2 toes blackened by gangrene. It was a humbling experience. We took our limbs for granted and little aches and pains, we are already complaining and groaning. My neighbour was moaning in pain. Every moan brought out the pain in me. I could only emphatise and it was as if I could feel the pain. It was also scaring seeing how he had let the disease took control of his body.

"Ya Allah, kata Mu, setiap penyakit menggugurkan satu dosa yang dilakukan oleh hamba Mu. Tapi, berikanlah kekuatan dan kesabaran agar hamba Mu redha dengan dugaan Mu. Berat mata memandang, sakit lagi dia yang menanggung. Kata Mu jua, ya Allah, selepas kesusahan datang kesenangan, maka hendaklah kamu berusaha dan hanya kepada Nya kamu berserah. Engkau menduga dengan apa yang mampu ditanggung oleh hamba Mu itu. Hanya Engkau tahu setakat mana kemampuan hamba Mu. Redhailah dia dan permudahkanlah untuknya".

My colleague looked a lot more relaxed and accepting. She also looked much better. The burden of making the decision must had weighed heavily on her as it affected her husband and children. Her husband said she could sleep better now as the pain was much bearable. She was considering optional retirement or medical board. I don't know if I can come to terms with this condition. Losing a limb is like losing something that makes you complete. Our body is not ours anyway. It is a gift from Allah and we are obligated to take care of it. Nothing is ours. "He taketh what He has giveth, when and how He so chooses." 

Thank you, ya Allah, for allowing me to visit her. For having friends who thoughtfully considered asking me to join them. For bringing a little cheer to her. For making someone's life a little happier. It's her 48th birthday today. May she faces life with more love, tolerance, patience and acceptance. May her husband and children have the patience and love to care and accept her. InsyaAllah. Amin.